v-day shme-day

valentine's shmalentine's. it is a stupid holdiay. honestly, i'm not trying to bluff and act like i don't like it just so that i seem tough and so that i won't get hurt if my sweet day of love isn't perfect. i just don't get the point really. if bart can't make me feel like i'm the most important thing in the world EVERY SINGLE DAY OF HIS EVER LOVING LIFE, then i don't want him to act like it one day out of the year. seriously people, i'm all about quality AND quantity. i want all of your attention, and all of your sweetness, every single day. not a whole bunch of semi-okay days and then a big-to-do some random day in february. i want your whole world to revolve around me every day. and i think i deserve that. i am, as you already know, the queen-supreme-commander of my (and your) universe. bart't birthday is the day before valentine's day...so we went to dinner at winger's with zack...mucho fun. we had a very nice waiter-man who gave me free asphalt pie, i loved him, and the pie...and i like spicy chicken fingers and potatoe skins...i am doing the homer simpson face where he thinks about bacon right now. i really like winger's. then we took maddi to my mom's house and hit up the holiday inn...to see the freaking sweet-arse-hil-hairy-ass hypnotist. this gentle man was very funny...and the 4 stooges that he hypnotized where entertaining as well. i especially like the "brother" as zack and bart referred to him. my best friend amber sutton got a broom for valentine's day...it has flying capabilities. i would like a broom, but not for valentine's day...just because i want a broom day would be nice. but that is a cool gift, the broom is sweet looking-no joke. maddi is on this new kick where she feels the need to point at random people in wal-mart, or anywhere really, and tell them "no, no." she told a woman in walmart yesterday "no, no" as she picked up a copy of "this is it, the michael jackson sob story extravaganza. i agreed with that "no, no." come on people. so i buy this toothpaste, well actually i didn't but it, i got it for free from work as a sample... and it eats my gums off. one hundred percent no exagerating ten minutes after i brush my teeth with this stuff i can run a qtip between my gums and teeth and pull out skin...LOTS OF SKIN. gross right? and it hurts my teeth like candy hurts my teeth. this crap might actually have sugar in it. who the heck puts sugar in tooth paste. it's not supposed to be sweet people...it's supposed to be minty. just like "it's not gum, YOU DON'T CHEW IT!" the picture of the tooth paste is at the top of the page because i am not tech savy and i don't have talene here to help me. and lately i have had to put maddi in button done pajamas with a onesie over them before putting her to bed at night. her new favorite thing to do is take off all of her clothes, and then shimmy out of her diaper, and jump around the crib naked...and then if she's feeling extra fiesty, she likes to pull up the bottom of the crib and pee. fan-freaking-tastic fun right? wrong. she also managed to get all of her clothes and diaper off yesterday and pee on bart's white carpet while i was trying to do the dishes. and she's never going to learn not to, because i can't help but laugh everytime she does it! bart does not laugh, however, he duct tapes on the diapers. and bart took us to burger king the other day. maddi put on her own crown...and ate about three packets of ketchup. i was getting kinda frustrated because i couldn't get her to eat anything else...but bart told her that just eating ketchup was okay, because it is made outta tomatoes and tomatoes are vegetables so he didn't know what i was complaining about. i told him that you can't let a toddler survive on just ketchup. people get their kids taken away for that. and i don't wanna be the next brittney spears...i like my hair and my dignity. and my boss, the wonderful and sweet dr. hanson, sent all of us girls at work flowers for the dumb holiday. he is seriously the nicest man ever...and his wife is sweet too! that's all for now. stay classy readers, kelly "kapowski"